to: my dearest deceased grandpa,

Hey old man.

Why didn't you fuck off?

Why didn't you stop?

Why decided to do shit, and left us?

Why lived like asshole, and dead as sidekick hero?

Why you loved us,

then left us,

along with unfinished living burden?

Why?

You are fucking asshole, you know that?

I don't even want to finish your mistake,

there's no fault that needed to be undone like mom always said to me.

Even forgiving you,

ugh,

fuck you old grand.

So, why?

Aren't I, your most favourite one?

Why giving me the hard time, to even struggle the same choices,

like you did in the past,

Ungku?

I'm your granddaughter, grandpops. Also, I'm just human.

I don't even able to forgive your sins, but I willingly carry your heritage down.

Don't you see it from above, how hard I tried to move on?

Even there's no way you can read this,

even i always said fuck you everytime i visit your grave.

I really troubled now, ungku.

What should i do?

Who fucking even know it would be this hard.

I dont know what to do anymore, Ungku.

Am I going to make it? Can I survive?

Let me live peacefully, Ungku.

Please.